I can't mount the bitch!

This afternoon I was feeling like I needed a little something to satisfy me. I am tired of humping stuffed animals, so I tried to corner my wife/sister/mother Lhotse for a little action. I am not sure of the exact status of our relationship because when I was little i sucked her teets like a baby kitten does with its mother, when i grew i fell in love with her, and yet she is my sister so anyway...she just hissed at me. Fuck her! I want a piece of tail. Oh well better luck next time. Right now I am just gonna go scratch myself and lick my ass. I find it very frustrating not having testicles and yet still having sexual urges. My parents (assholes) took me to the vet when I was a tiny kitten and made them cut off my balls. The worst part about dat was dat they PAID THEM to hurt me, sick and twisted and not nice. Now I have no balls and I only have stuffed animals. Damn it. This is my wife that I tried to mount, she is one fiesty feline.